Our Great Story: The first entry

This post is a bit unusual because I have been feeling that keeping records is becoming more and more important in these last days, so that my children may know my feelings about family and my dear husband. This is why I am beginning to write a journal, but more like a small book (for now) about my life with Daniel so my children will realize the importance of Heavenly Father's plan. I have a great love for the Gospel and I am grateful for the way being raised with the truth has influenced my life. I am grateful for eternal families and I am excited to be with those I love forever. This is why I feel the need to begin writing. The journal or small book I have chose to write is called Our Great Story.

Here is the entry:

 

So…I have decided after reading a quote by C.S. Lewis that I should write the story of my journey with my husband because our story is so important to me and it will go on forever. My memories fade so quickly that I am afraid that I will lose those precious moments from the earlier stages of our relationship; luckily Daniel’s memory is a bit more long-lasting. This being said, the quote says 

“Now at last they were beginning Chapter One of the Great Story no one on earth has ever read, which goes on forever: in which every chapter is better than the one before.”

Let me explain my thoughts as I read that beautiful quote. I often tell Daniel that I feel like my life started the moment I said yes across the alter in the Seattle Washington Temple 2.5 years ago on a wet cold December day, shortly after Christmas. Though I knew then that marriage and family is held most dear to Heavenly Father’s Plan of Salvation, I didn’t quite understand how important. I know that I will never understand in this Earthly world—the love our Father has for us is never-ending and glorious. That’s the kind of love I know I will have for Daniel one day, but at this time we are still little flightless birds waiting to flap our wings and leave our Earthly world to start our eternal life together with our gorgeous children. Until we have fully and successfully experienced what our spiritual Father and Mother have, we will never understand the true extent of what love is meant to be. So my temple marriage to Daniel was the beginning of my new life and this Earthly life we will share together is only chapter one of our Great Story with infinite chapters until the end.

Stuff

Michigan was a blast (minus the sick kids)!

I spent the first part of the week with an old friend.....we have known each other about 6 years now! It was nice to see her and to know she is doing fairly well. :) We ate at one of my favorite places-- the Elephant Bar in Toledo, Ohio. We swam and relaxed in a pool and got a hotel for the night to just relax and be away. It was a very good time and I'm glad it happened.

I also seen Ms. Holoway (my old violin teacher in middle school as well  as my private violin teacher for years after). We are good friends and she is a must see whenever I go back to Michigan! I also had a great time talking to her and having lunch, but especially I loved playing duets together!!!

I also saw my old friend Pat. It was nice to see him as well. We ate at China Express, a place we use to eat at a lot when we were taking the same classes years back. I can't believe that is is nearly 3 years since I moved to Utah!!!

I spent most of my time with my family, and they deserve the most time. I liked playing with the kids and bonding with each of them (though I stayed away for some of the time due to them being sick). I sure do love them. :) I also liked spending time with my turtles!

I graduated a few days before I left for MI, and Daniel's parents and my mom came out to visit. Thanks guys!

Now I am just sitting and waiting (which is super annoying) for my field camp to start.

In July we are visiting some of Daniel's family in Boston.
In August we might go back to MI for another visit.
In September I am going to GSA in Colorado.
Some time this year, Daniel and I want to make it to Mexico.

Those are our plans thus far for the rest of this year.

It is Time

This will be my last post of the semester. All I have left is finals which will be done Saturday evening and 2 assignments (hydro report to finish and english presentation to give).

I am super happy that I will be heading off to Michigan after my mom visits me in Utah to see me walk  for graduation. I am mostly excited for her to meet some of my friends and my favorite professor. :)

Michigan will be relaxing and enjoyable, but I will be busy as well, probably reading up on my old geology notes and books for field camp.

I know I am not looking forward to field camp-- but this isn't because I don't enjoy field work or my major. I am mainly not looking forward to it because it is my last class...the one thing in my way for my future family and officially graduating.

I am actually really looking forward to field camp in that I can relearn some ArcGIS and be outside with my friends. Mostly I am excited to practice all tat I have learned in my courses. The ultimate geology final!!!

I probably won't post much before my official graduation in June because I will be gone and busy. But afterwards I will be so incredibly free. I plan to read, cook, pick up cross-stitching, and maybe pick up golfing. I want to go hiking in the canyons everyday.I also think I will read up on the research going on in geology to keep up-to-date. Eventually I will look for a job. Those close to me know why I am not looking too hard right now.  Grad school will happen after Daniel graduates and gets a job so I know where to apply.

That's pretty much it. Mostly life is peaceful but terrifying right now-- just like it should be. :)

Final Crunch

Ok folks, the final crunch is here!!!

The assignments I have left for Winter semester:

- one history paper to write after reading a book
- a critique to write for English
- A presentation to give in English
-A hydro report to research and write
- A presentation to give in hydro

-  take History final
- take Geophysics final

Finals will be complete on the 20th of April. Graduation April 25-26th. Then Michigan for a week followed by 5-6 weeks of GEOL 410 and after all this I will be done with my undergraduate studies!!

Also, General Conference is this weekend and Stake Conference is next weekend. :)  Life is good people.

For now thought I will deal with no sleep for the next week and a half. :)

Good luck everyone on the end of the semester crunch!!!

You are never alone and we need to care for others as well

So, I won't go into details of why this blog post is being written. Just know that life is precious and you may feel alone, but you are never alone. People always say Heavenly Father is always just a prayer away and it is so true (though if you are not open you may not feel how close He really is to you).

But Heavenly Father is not the only one who is always around and willing to listen when you need a shoulder to cry on.

Everyday I think of so many people in my life-- my in-laws (every one of them), my parents, my brothers and sisters, people from the ward, my primary children, my husband, extended family, friends I haven't spoken to since high school, friends I have fallen away from recently, close friends, acquaintances from school, friends on other continents, and those who have passed away. If I think of so many people in one day, then you never know who has been thinking of you.

Of course many of those people you may not be able to just call up and feel like you can pour out your whole soul, but there is always someone who is thinking about you and hoping you are doing well and would love to hear from you.

So, don't feel like you are alone. And not only that, but if you don't feel alone or don't need a hand, maybe someone you are thinking of throughout the day does need someone to talk to. We as human being need to stick out for one another and quit thinking "Oh, I don't want this person to think I am stalking them," "I don't want this person to think I am always using them" or "I don't want this person to get sick of me checking up on them." If that person does think that then it is their loss.

People need to understand that we are social creatures and depend on knowing we are loved by someone. We also need to stop caring what other people think of us.

People form their own opinions about you moments after they see you, but that may not be who you are, and you don't have to prove anything to anyone. You just have to be yourself.

That being said, it is so very important to stay in contact with friends and family member because it is rare for a person to come right out and tell people their problems. We as friends and family members have to be carefully watching for hints and clues about how a person is doing so that we can care for them and let them know we are there. When they are ready, they will open up.

I feel very hypocritical writing this. I have not always been there for friends or family. When I have been there for friends or family sometimes I feel like I am a nuisance and that is what makes me stop trying to care for them. But I shouldn't stop trying because of that, because some of those people really do need help and are just trying to push people away.

I am one of those people who are prideful and hate getting help or sympathy from anyone. I come off as cold and uncaring. The truth is I am shy  and though I may push you away I truly appreciate your concern and secretly always want those who are in my life to help me when I need help and be there for me when I am feeling down or going through something particularly rough.

And also I want to give a plea out to those who push people away-- don't ignore those who are there for you. Acknowledge that you know that they are trying to help, don't just ignore texts, calls, facebook messages, or face to face contact. The person who is trying to help is just telling you that they are there for you and you are not alone (especially when they know you are struggling). 

With the current events in my life I now realize I need to reach out to all those who are dear to me and let them know I am there and they are never alone.

(And lastly a shout out to my friend Stephanie Whitman who as I was writing this blog entry called me to check up on how I am doing. That is what a true friend would do.)

Almost there?

It's that time of year. It came earlier than it normally does. Typically I expect to be stressed to the core a week or two before finals, but not this year. A month and a half till finals and I am feeling it. I've already talked to Daniel about just graduating in August, but I won't do that...I honestly can't do that. Especially since I just want school done for now. I am looking forward to a nice half a semester to a year break from school that I am giving to myself after 6 years of college.

Yep 6. I should have graduated long ago, but I started off as a music major and then changed to a chemistry major. After my associates in chemistry I decided that I wanted to be a chemical engineer (even though after an associates in chemistry a major in chemistry would be rather quick and painless).  After a short while in that and after getting married to Daniel I decided I liked the exploration side of chemical engineering better and switched to geology. Now I have made one last refinement to my major--  I don't care about oil anymore, I am a hydro girl. I love hydrogeology, everything to do with it.

It has taken me 6 years to officially decide what I want to put my talents to and I don't regret it. I love my major! I just have to get through a few more months of schooling and I can finally tell people that I am a geologist. After 2 years of graduate school I can tell people I am a hydrogeologist. Now that will be a great day!!!

Crying and Laughter

So today was an uneventful day off. This weekend I meant to clean and get ahead, but instead I was just super sad about waiting a year until I go into grad school. I love education and I shed lots and lots of tears over it.

You know when you cry and you have so much snot in your nose you can't breathe through it and it starts running all over the place?

So I reached the snotty mess point and that's when Daniel comes up to me with an earplug and proceeds to put it up my nose. When I asked why I would want an earplug up my nose he said "Kinda like a tampon, but to soak up your snot!" So that's when I burst into laughter.

Hindsight

I am determined to make this semester one where I will enjoy being at school. I have found myself thinking about leaving BYU more and more often. I look at my best friends and everyone is so wrapped up in their lives that I can't predict anything. Then I look at my acquaintances in my major and find myself wondering if we could have been good friends if I had opened up more. Once I leave BYU most or all my contacts will just be through facebook. This saddens me, especially since I will stay in Utah with no family or many friends. I just feel like I have lost out on opportunities to expand my relationships and now it's too late. 

Last semester Daniel and I never saw each other because we were both so busy with school. We agreed at the last part of that semester to always MAKE time for each other, just for each other. We make time by praying together, reading scriptures together, planning primary lessons together, and we talk before we fall asleep. If we are both stressed we will take 15-30 minutes out of school stuff to just hang out and make sure we both know we are there for each other. I am grateful for Daniel and his effort to take time out of work and studying to be with me. I feel like spending time with your spouse is one of the most important goals to have.

I know I am lucky and blessed. Daniel and I have our struggles with money, but I am glad our relationship doesn't suffer the same struggles.

Live and Prepare

Live for today. 

Okay....so this is probably obvious to most people....and I admit that I thought about it occasionally but it really never sank in. I was always like "yeah yeah, I am living for today. I am enjoying my life," but I wasn't. I was half living my life for today but I was always thinking about 5 months-5 years in the future.

I didn't understand the difference between preparing for the future and living in the future. Well.....a couple days ago I was sulking (like always) about the future and then I read something that really hit me.

I can't remember where it was from but it essentially said that if you live in the future you will miss things in the present and eventually you will realize what you missed and will want to go back and re-live those moments...but you can't.

This I already knew, but I needed to hear again and again and again until I could change my life to live in the present but prepare for the future.

When I was single I lived to be married, graduate, and have kids.

Now I am married and I want to graduate, have kids, get a job, and get a house to settle down in.

I sometimes think back to my single days and yes I enjoyed them, but I find I can't remember much about them. I wish I had lived more then and not stressed over my future too much. Now I am married and childless, but I have a feeling I won't remember the years where I only spent it with my dearest husband because I was always anxious to graduate and wanting to start a family so badly that it physically hurts to think about the future. Why put myself through so much stress and agony?

I know that if I continue this way that once I have kids I will be wanting them to walk, talk, be potty trained and sooner of later their babyhood will be over and I will miss those days when I could just hold them. I don't want to look back when all my kids are grown up and be filled with regrets that I didn't live in the moment.

Essentially I have learned to think about the future in a way that I will be prepared for it (insurance, graduation, etc) but I won't dwell on "what ifs." It's fun to fantasize about the future....but to let it consume every part of my life is ridiculous.

So just live for the moment, but prepare for the future. Grow spiritually and Heavenly Father will watch over you and things will happen when they are meant to happen.

Utah Winter Freezing Rain: Ice skating!

Yep I went ice skating today! I have only been ice skating maybe....3 or 4 times in my life (mostly when I was super uber little). Utah's freezing rain made it extremely interesting to walk to and from classes. I am sure it was interesting for those driving and riding bikes as well. I mastered a slow granny walk and witnessed many stumbles and falls. What I wish I had seen were the people going down the ramp from the Marriot (video below)!!! It sure does look like a blast (NOT)!

Honestly, they should have cancelled morning classes until the grounds crew had a chance to work their magic. If I were pregnant and came to campus today I would be terrified of a bad fall. I hope no one was seriously injured. 

Is it over yet?

The only feeling I have this semester is eagerness to get it over with. I want to start the next phase of my life, it is so overdue!!! There isn't a day that goes by where my mind isn't overwhelmed with thoughts of the future.

oh bother

So one thing that bothers me is when people schedule something and then forget altogether and you are left hanging after clearing all your plans.

Today was such a day. I went home from school (e-mailing an assignment because I knew I wouldn't be on campus to turn it in properly). I got ready to go and waited and waited....and waited. Then she calls and wants to set up another time....but she sounds like she has no idea that we had already set a time-- for today and now! So now I have to do this all again.

Ok, rant done.

Sunrise

I am staying home from school today because one of my classes was cancelled and the other is going over things I know.

I was a little sad that I didn't go to campus, but sitting on my couch with a window facing the mountains as the sun rose above them was priceless. I wouldn't have seen this if I went to school in the morning.

I just love how our cream colored curtains glow as the suns rays shine through them. :)

Last semester (minus field camp)

My classes this last normal semester: US History, English 316 (might drop), Zumba, Geophysics, and advanced hydrogeology (graduate class)

This semester is going to be difficult, but I think I am going to do well. I think this semester is going to be more difficult for my dear Daniel.

After this semester I only have a 6 week field course and then I graduate. 

Our goals this year:

1. Save save save!!!! There is more motivation now that we can see our future a bit more clearer!

2. I will graduate this year

3. Not miss a Sunday (only miss for extreme cases of course)

4. Read scriptures together every night. Since both of us are always super busy with school and work, we have struggled with this in the past. But no longer!

5. Pray every night. Sometimes we are both too tired to say a combined prayer, but we are working on this.

6. Eat healthy and exercise. Just being healthy.

7. Go to the Temple once a month. If anyone wants to go with us to the temple every month let me know. I love going with other couples. :)

8. For Daniel and me to make time for each other every day. Last semester we never had time for each other and it was hard on both of us. We find this one really important. Going along with this , when we are in public together we plan on holding hands more and kissing more often. I hate public affection, but when I only spend time with Daniel in public I find it important to be there for each other.

We have lots of goals, but they are all super doable. Daniel is excited for this new and improved life as well. I already feel a difference in my life. I am so much happier. :)